"One day, whether you are 14, 28 or 65,
you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die." - Beau Taplin
And without meeting, you two would be completely different people.
For some people that is a lover, for me it was my best friend.
It was a rainy Easter morning, and I got a DM on Twitter from a girl I had only met once or twice before. Being a somewhat shy person that time, I wondered, "How ballsy is this girl to DM me even though we haven't seen each other for years, asking if I want to study at a hookah lounge because she's in the area?"
This situation describes Mary very well. She is an outgoing, free spirit who you can take anywhere and not worry if she will get along with all your Asian friends. She is the person you can count on to hit up rap concerts in Detroit and rage even though you are both sober amongst a crowd of teens. Mary is the person who not only convinces you to buy a $100 ticket to a charity ball in the DIA but also buy a far more expensive gown to don at said charity ball. She is the same person who somehow convinces you to do the splits on the dirty floor of a night club in Ann Arbor on the count of three. Mary is the one that is down for any last minute adventure even if it is an impromptu day trip to Chicago. She is the only other person I don't mind getting ready with because she takes even longer than I do. She is the person who once had four jobs but also did school full time. She adopted two cats and one of them only has 3 legs. Mary is a girl who has gone through so much hardship in life but still has the biggest heart and who I can count on to keep me grounded.
It's hard for girls to find true friends in life, of this I am so certain. For some reason, the female kind has this strange need to compete with one another. Constantly comparing, judging, and bashing in the name of self-validation. I'm sure it's some sort of evolutionary pre-programing that pins us girls against one another, but because of this, it has been difficult for me to find solace in female friendships. I've had many come close but failing and some who just don't come close at all because of this exact predisposition to compete. Finding Mary, and discovering what it is like to have a female friendship that exists no trace of competition and only mutual love and encouragement was a miracle.
In order for us to cross paths, we both had to go through a set of specific events that led us together. Had we not gone through terrible relationships at the same time, had I received a job offer and moved, had she not had a calc exam, we wouldn't have studied together that Easter afternoon, and probably never became...us. In retrospect, all the doors that closed and all the series of unfortunate events brought me an irreplaceable person, for that I'm glad things worked out the way that they did. Life is funny that way.
I don't know what else to say, but I have a partner in life who I don't need a ring to stay with me forever. Who I can text every day and never get tired of. Who if we don't see one another for too long we get fussy. Who I have talked about the future with far more times than I have to any significant other and don't feel weird about it. And most importantly my plus one in all situations.
Happy 23rd Birthday, Mary!
Header photo done by http://www.joemarte.com/